


Boyfriends

by carissima



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Boys In Love, Canon Compliant, Cotton Candy Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Feelings, Feels, First Dates, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-10
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-29 01:23:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/999200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carissima/pseuds/carissima
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry decides that he wants a boyfriend. Liam's there for him, until Harry realises he maybe doesn't need to look very far at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Boyfriends

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, this got completely out of control. And didn't go where I thought it would at all. And then it descended into ridiculous fluff towards the end and don't judge me because I'm just in the mood for stupid lovey dovey smoochy faces, okay?
> 
> Come find me on [Tumblr](http://carissimali.tumblr.com/). I'm taking requests for Lirry Christmas fics. YES I KNOW IT'S EARLY BUT I'M STILL DOING IT.

When Liam steps into the tour bus, he's greeted with the sight of Louis and Eleanor making out. Rolling his eyes good-naturedly because it's a sight he's familiar with by now and he really doesn't begrudge them their time together since they spend so much of their time apart, he sees Harry lying face down on the sofa. Making a beeline for him, he's about to lean down to tickle Harry because really he's just leaving himself wide open for it, when he pauses and takes a closer look.

Harry seems to be staring at Louis and Eleanor.

Liam's hand is hovering over Harry's back, poised to tickle but something tells him this isn't the time. Instead, he shifts to drop his hand gently onto Harry's head and lets his fingers bury themselves in Harry's curly mop.

Harry turns his head slowly and it's like he's literally dragging his eyes away.

Liam immediately reverts to protective mode and he crouches down to block the couple from Harry's view. "Hey."

Harry's eyes are now locked on him and he can see the sadness in Harry's beautiful green gaze. Liam lets his hand drop onto Harry's shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"You okay?"

Harry shrugs and that's all it takes for Liam to grab his hands and yank him up off the sofa, ignoring Harry's unhurried protests as he tugs him out of the room and into the bunk area. He pushes him gently towards Harry's bunk. Harry shifts so that he's more comfortable as he sits on the edge of the bunk and looks up at Liam, who eventually takes a seat on his bunk opposite.

"What's up?" Liam asks and he keeps his voice low and soft. His hand reaches out to cover Harry's, resting on Harry's knee and he strokes the soft skin idly. Harry just looks down at their hands and frowns.

"Come on, talk to me," Liam says and he squeezes Harry's hand in reassurance.

Harry's eyes drop immediately to the floor and Liam can feel his heart sink.

"It's okay, Haz," Liam soothes and he grabs Harry's other hand, offering strength to his friend. "We'll get through whatever this is, yeah? It's okay."

"It's nothing," Harry says quietly and he sighs like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders. "It's nothing, Li. I swear."

"I don't believe you," Liam says, shifting slightly so he can lean forward, because Harry is barely audible at the best of times. "Why are you so sad, huh?"

"It's silly," Harry says and his tone suggests that he'd like Liam to drop the whole subject, but they both know that's not going to happen. Liam can never walk away from any of them when he knows there's something wrong. He's like a dog with a proverbial bone when it comes to one of them being upset and fixing them. "I just - well, I just wish I could have what they have, you know?"

Liam blinks slowly as he tries to understand. "You want a boyfriend?"

Harry shrugs yet again and Liam can tell he's a little embarrassed, which throws Liam completely because he's never known Harry to actively seek out a relationship before. Liam is at a complete loss of how to proceed or what to say, so he just continues to stroke Harry's hands and waits.

"It's stupid, right?" Harry glances up at Liam as if looking for validation.

"Of course it's not stupid," Liam says automatically because it's _not_ stupid that Harry wants someone to love and to love him back. If anyone deserves love it's Harry. He's often thought it strange that Harry has been single in all the time he's known him. "What's brought this on then?"

Harry flushes and Liam heroically manages to stop his mouth from dropping open in shock because he's never seen Harry blush before. "I guess it's been sort of there for a while. Like when Perrie comes to visit and Zayn gets all stupid and giggly and it's ridiculous because Zayn being giggly is so beyond weird but also kind of amazing and that's what I want, I think."

"Yeah," Liam says softly. If anyone understands, it's him. He loves being in a relationship and although he's been enjoying his freedom recently, part of him still craves that feeling when someone is entirely focused on you, who smiles when you walk into the room, who lights up when you're near and who loves you more than anyone else.

"So, perhaps I should like, go on dates and stuff," Harry says slowly.

Liam nods encouragingly.

"But maybe I should wait til we're back home," Harry says and looks to Liam for assurance and smiles when Liam nods thoughtfully. "I think it'd be easier when we're not on tour and I can, you know, have some time to myself without everyone watching. What do you think?"

Liam lets go of one of Harry's hands and reaches up to bop Harry on the nose, grinning when Harry wrinkles his nose and grins back. "Whatever you think is best, Haz. I'll support you."

"Yeah," Harry murmurs as he leans in and lets Liam hold him in a loose embrace, his hands stroking gently down Harry's back. "I know."

"Hey, let's go shopping," Liam says because he knows it always cheers Harry up.

"Shopping?" Harry asks and Liam can see his eyes light up. "What kind of shopping?"

"Uh, whatever shopping you like?" Liam says. "Clothes, music, home stuff?"

"Clothes," Harry says decisively and Liam thinks it'll be totally worth the hassle of trying to get past fans and closing down stores (which Liam still thinks is lame but he understands the necessity of it) just to keep that smile on Harry's face.

It takes very little persuasion to get Paul to agree and soon they're pulling up outside a designer store and Harry's eyes are lighting up like it's Christmas morning as he looks at the store front and eyes up some outfits.

Harry reaches over and grabs Liam's hand before the door opens and they emerge together, keeping hold of each other as they smile at the fans and wave as they sign a few autographs and pose for pictures before their hands find each other again as they're ushered inside.

Liam pulls him closer as they head for the first rail and hugs him for a second. "Okay?"

Harry nods as he starts to browse and soon the poor store assistants are buried under jackets and jeans and shirts for Harry while Liam has passed over a few things to try on. Eventually, Harry stops pulling out clothes and heads for the changing room, dragging Liam into the same one as he pulls off his skinny jeans and tugs on almost identical ones. Harry asks Liam for his opinion on everything and Harry listens carefully, rejecting anything that Liam doesn't rave over and spending ages trying to check out everything from every angle. He ums and ahs over a jacket that Liam thinks looks great on him and eventually deciding to put it in his 'buy' pile. Liam is persuaded by Harry to buy two pairs of jeans that Harry thinks make Liam's arse look amazing, so really Liam can't say no. By the time they're ready to leave, Liam's blown a couple of hundred dollars while Harry's purchases run into the thousands but Liam knows it's worth every penny because Harry is happy and smiling as they pose for more pictures before being whisked into the car.

Harry cuddles up to Liam and grins happily as he rests his head on Liam's shoulder with Liam's arm around his shoulder and falling to his waist.

"You're the best, Li," Harry murmurs happily.

Liam eyes up the bags in the back of the car and simply refuses to think about the amount of money they've just spent. Instead, he lets his head rest on Harry's and closes his eyes.

When they get back on the bus, Harry insists on pulling every purchase out to show the rest of the boys, who have varying levels of interest. Niall, who is completely disinterested, loads up FIFA and hands a controller to Liam, who starts to play with half concentration as he's also keeping an eye on Harry. Zayn looks up from his phone every now and again and gives his opinion, good or bad, which Harry just rolls his eyes at. Louis insists on Harry trying on everything and gives a nonstop commentary on whether he thinks it's flattering or not. It results in Harry throwing himself on Louis and tickling him until Louis gives in and calls for Eleanor's help.

Harry's mood immediately shifts as Eleanor steps into the room, looking sleepy and adorable from what was clearly a nap and Louis whisks her back to the double room at the back of the bus that couples use whenever girlfriends visit. Liam doesn't even realise he's moved until he finds himself sat next to Harry, throwing an arm around him, dragging him into his body and cuddling while keeping an eye on the television and fouling Niall, who protests loudly while Liam laughs. He throws the controller to Zayn who drops his phone to catch it and he's right in the game within seconds, leaving Liam free to turn to Harry, who looks up at Liam with a slightly wobbly smile and the sight of Harry looking anything other than completely at ease and comfortable has Liam's stomach swooping and his face drops. He grabs Harry's hand and stands up, muttering something about needing to talk to him and just hauls him out of the room. He stands by the door, trying to figure out where they can go before drawing him into the bathroom. He pushes the door shut behind him and drags Harry into a hug, which Harry returns tightly.

"I'm such an idiot," Harry mutters and Liam just holds on tighter.

"Just think about how amazing you're going to look on your first date with what could be the love of your life," Liam says sweetly.

Harry laughs and drops his head onto Liam's shoulder, his body shaking uncontrollably. "Liam, you're such a soppy romantic," he says with a shake of his head. "How on earth have you managed to stay single for months?"

Liam shrugged and frowned. "I thought you wanted a relationship?"

"I do," Harry says quickly. "But I mean if I get a great night of sex instead, that'd be okay."

Liam swats him lightly around the head and rolls his eyes. "Either way, you'll be a lot happier."

Harry hums in agreement as he presses a sloppy kiss against Liam's cheek. "Absolutely. In the meantime, I have you to cheer me up."

"Glad I can help," Liam grumbles as Harry laughs in delight once more.

When Eleanor goes home, Harry's mood lightens and while Liam is keeping a close eye on him, he rarely sees Harry looking sad, nothing that a ruffle of his hair or tickling his tummy can't solve anyway.

Of course, that might be because Liam is deliberately distracting Harry and filling his days and nights off. So far, they've gone to a jazz night with Zayn, they've hit the beach whenever they're on the coast, they've snuck into a few movie theatres to watch a few romantic comedies that Liam has wanted to scratch his skin off during but Harry has laughed long and loudly through them all so Liam guesses it's worth it in the end, they've been to a few basketball games and on their nights in, Liam has sat through hours and hours of Harry's favourite boxsets. Well, he's sat next to Harry and dozed through them, but he's still physically _been there_ and Harry has seemed to enjoy it, so Liam's counting them as wins as well.

It's all going really well until Perrie drops by for a flying visit. Zayn lights up when she's nearly there and drums his fingers on his thighs as he anxiously waits for her to arrive.

Harry's on his phone, texting or on twitter, Liam's not sure, but he keeps looking up at Zayn before his gaze darts away. Liam's hand moves so that it rests on Harry's leg as he reads the latest email from his mum. He feels Harry's sigh and Harry's hand rests on his lightly. Liam turns his hand so that he can thread his fingers through Harry's and he squeezes gently.

When Perrie bursts through the door and throws herself on Zayn, Liam carefully sneaks a glance at Harry, who just looks at him. His mouth lifts into a small smile and Liam's so relieved that Harry's okay that he just beams at him. Harry reaches out to touch the crinkles by one of Liam's eyes and he grins before his hand drops back down to lace once again with Liam's.

"You okay?" Liam says quietly as Harry's smile begins to fade.

"Yeah, I'm good," Harry says and Liam actually believes him this time. "Just ... stay here, yeah?"

Liam nods and turns back to his email, his hand still in Harry's.

Perrie only stays for one night before she has to get back to the band and then it's their last night on tour and soon enough they're on a plane back home, exhausted but excited to be on their way to London at last. Liam thinks he could sleep for a week, but Harry wants to head straight out to catch up with friends. Niall is heading back to Mullingar straight from Heathrow and Louis wants to bury himself in family. Zayn just wants to disappear.

When they land, they're all hugging and kissing each other goodbye, and it's always a mixed feeling of sadness and elation that they all understand perfectly. Soon it's just Liam and Harry heading towards their car to share a lift back to their houses and they snuggle up in the backseat, shattered. Liam can feel his eyes drooping as he managed to stay awake on the flight over but he's just about done for and he's dreaming of his big, comfortable bed and turning off his phone to just sleep until he can't sleep anymore.

"Hey, Li?"

Harry's voice rouses him and he opens one eye to find Harry staring at him.

"Yeah Haz?" Liam's voice is husky with sleep and he can barely focus on Harry's eyes which are swimming in front of him.

"Come back to mine?"

"Huh?" Liam shakes his head as if to clear it but he still feels fuzzy.

"I don't want to go back to my place alone. Come back with me?" Harry asks again.

"Okay," Liam agrees sleepily as he lets his head fall back onto Harry's shoulder.

When he next wakes, Harry is shaking him gently and telling him that they're home. Liam grabs his bags and follows Harry to the front door, remembering just in time to turn and thank the driver before he stumbles into Harry's house and the door closes behind him.

"Come on," Harry grabs Liam's hand and tugs him upstairs, laughing as Liam trips several times before Harry shoves him into his bedroom. Liam tugs his shirt over his head and kicks off his converse before attempting to drag his jeans off. He finally manages it and falls headfirst onto the bed, grumbling as Harry tries to drag the covers from under him. He feels Harry slide into bed next to him and then he has a handful of almost naked Harry curling up against him.

Liam tiredly lifts his arm and Harry scoots under to slot his body in tightly. Liam doesn't notice because he's fast asleep.

When he wakes up, he's sprawled across the bed. Or more accurately, he's sprawled across Harry. Somehow in the night, he's flung an arm and leg over Harry as if he's pinning him to the bed and his head is burrowed into Harry's shoulder. Liam shifts slightly to bring his arm and leg back to a more reasonable position before he lifts his head to find Harry's face turned towards him, mouth open and drooling. Liam grins and fumbles around for his phone, snapping a quick picture that he plans to use for blackmail at a later date.

Liam wriggles a little and starts to poke Harry's side, muffling a laugh when Harry frowns in his sleep before his eyes shoot open and he flips over so he lands on top of Liam, to his surprise. Harry's down before Liam can stop him and he finds himself on the receiving end of a love bite. He knows there'll be a mark there by the time he can remove Harry so he just lies back and lets Harry continue, enjoying the feel of his mouth on his skin in a way that Liam no longer finds weird. Sometimes, it was just nice to feel a physical connection to someone, even if that someone was one of your best mates and he was only doing it for a laugh.

When Harry finally lifts his head, he's grinning like a lunatic and Liam can't help but reach out and tickle his sides. Harry falls forward and giggles furiously as he wriggles to escape but Liam just laughs, because it always amuses him when Harry thinks he can overpower him. Eventually Harry gives in and just flops against Liam, who shoves at Harry's shoulder so that he falls onto the mattress and they both take a minute to catch their breath.

"I guess I need to go home," Liam says finally, turning his head towards Harry.

Harry hums gently. "What are you gonna do today?"

"Uh," Liam thinks about what he should be doing today versus what he really wants to do today. For once, just today, he figures he's going to do what he wants because he's earned it after the tour and he's going to be selfish for once. "Nothing, really. I'm going to take a whole day and do nothing with it."

"Not even unpacking and doing your washing or calling your parents or some household chores?" Harry teases and he shakes his head in mock-disappointment at Liam's irresponsible ways.

"Nope," Liam says cheerfully and sticks his tongue out at Harry, who just grins.

"So instead of getting up, showering, dressing and catching a cab to yours, you could stay and we can hang around doing nothing all day and get takeaway and you can crash here again tonight," Harry says thoughtfully, casting a quick glance at Liam before staring up at the ceiling. "Because since I plan to do absolutely nothing as well, we could just do nothing together."

"You want me to stay?" Liam asks, the surprise clear in his tone. "I thought you'd be rushing to kick me out the door so you can catch up with all the people you haven't spent the last two months stuck in a tour bus with."

"Not really," Harry says and Liam can hear him sigh. "I hate going from seeing everyone every day to seeing no one and being on my own."

"Alright," Liam says easily, because he's more than happy to stay. "But we're not watching any rom-coms. Deal?"

Harry pouts but eventually gives in. Liam showers, and shoves Harry in after he gets out because he still has standards. Harry throws on some jogging bottoms and Liam manages to find some shorts in his bag and they sprawl across Harry's sofas. Harry persuades Liam to watch the first Harry Potter movie and they both yell out Harry's favourite line together and Liam tickles Harry until he's gasping for breath and collapses onto Liam's side. They remain locked together through Chamber of Secrets until Harry decides he's so hungry that he might die if they don't order Chinese.

Liam gets up to take delivery because Harry has decided that picking up the phone and placing the order is the entire sum of effort he can put into today and when Liam places everything on the table, Harry sends Liam upstairs to grab a duvet and they spend the rest of the evening eating too much food, laughing at each other and sneaking pinches and pokes to make the other jump.

When they finally decide to turn in for the night, Harry drags Liam into his room, ignoring Liam's protests and jumps under the covers, lifting them up for Liam who just sighs and climbs in. Harry cuddles up to him and Liam has to admit that he misses sharing a bed with someone and cuddling with Harry just happens to be a way of life for him now; it's almost unavoidable.

"Thanks for staying, Li," Harry says quietly into the silence.

Liam just tightens his arm around Harry and buries his head into Harry's neck.

In the morning, Liam wakes up and blearily announces that he really has to go home, but somehow (and Liam's a bit fuzzy on the details) Harry talks him into staying again. Not that Liam minds, he figures he'll head home at some point. They spend the day doing chores, like their washing and food shopping, bickering over fruit and whether they want carrots or broccoli for dinner, while Harry blocks all of Liam's attempts to throw anything with sugar in the basket. Harry relents when Liam throws popcorn in though and Liam thinks that's a pretty good compromise.

As they're unpacking the shopping , Harry casually mentions that Nick and a couple of friends are coming over.

Liam blinks slowly before he finishes putting the fruit in the overly large and ostentatious fruit bowl that Harry loves.

"Oh, okay," he says, trying to ignore the bubble of hurt and rejection rising in him because he knows Harry just wants to see his friends, which Liam can hardly blame him for, and it's time for him to go home really, so he starts towards the door. "I'll just grab my stuff and get out of here."

"Hey, what?"

Liam feels Harry's hand around his wrist and he's being turned around to face a confused Harry. "I thought you were staying here?"

"But you know, with Nick and that lot coming here, I thought you'd want me to go, yeah?" Liam asks, his voice a little huskier than usual. "I mean, I don't really know them and I don't think they really want me here, they're coming to see you and this means you won't be on your own anymore right?"

Harry just frowns. "Liam, I don't want you to go. I asked you to stay, remember? And who gives a toss if Nick likes you, because _I_ like you and _I_ asked you to stay because it's _my_ house and I want you to stay, so just stay, yeah?"

Confused, Liam just nods because he's not sure what else he can do. He doesn't really socialise with Harry's friends so he's a bit intimidated by them but if Harry wants him to stay, then of course he'll stay.

Harry slips his hand in Liam's and squeezes gently. "Okay?"

"Yeah, okay," Liam says and he manages a small smile. "Just don't abandon me, yeah?"

Harry just laughs and pulls Liam back into the kitchen to unpack the rest of the shopping.

The visit goes pretty well, Liam thinks. They stay for three hours, lounging around and catching Harry (and Liam by extension) up on what's happened while they've been out of the country. Liam doesn't exactly know who some of the gossip is about but he nods and smiles in the right places, he thinks. Nick makes Liam laugh a few times and he smiles at Liam in approval, so Liam counts that as a win. And Harry sits curled up next to him on the sofa for the entire time they're there. He doesn't cuddle Liam or get all handsy like Liam's used to Harry being, but he figures it's just that Harry behaves differently with different people and that's fine with Liam because he likes to discover new sides to Harry.

When they leave, Nick makes a point of saying goodbye to Liam and calls out that he's sure he'll see him soon and Liam stands on Harry's doorstep, waving goodbye because Harry's drawn him there. When Harry shuts the door, he flings his arms around Liam and shudders theatrically.

"God, they talk so much," Harry moans and Liam just rolls his eyes because he knows Harry loves gossiping and he loves his friends and this is just Harry being silly. "Dinner?"

"You're cooking, right?" Liam asks hesitantly because he's terrible in the kitchen.

"Course I am," Harry scoffs because he knows Liam's terrible in the kitchen. "Come keep me company."

While Harry cooks, Liam struggles to bring up the topic they've been avoiding while they've been holed up in Harry's house.

"Uh, Harry?"

"Yeah?" Harry asks distractedly as he tastes his sauce and wrinkles his nose before reaching for more seasoning.

"The whole dating and relationship thing, do you still want to do that?" Liam asks, a little nervous about bringing it up.

"Oh yeah," Harry says, whirling around and grinning. "I forgot about that. I should probably go out and meet some people, right?"

"Well, that's what you're best at," Liam points out with a smile. "You pick up more friends on a quick run to the shops than I've done in my entire life."

"Firstly, that's not true," Harry says sternly, waggling his spoon at Liam with a frown. "And secondly, I thought I was best at singing like an angel?"

"Who told you that?" Liam teases and moves to avoid the onion Harry's just thrown at him.

"You did at judges houses when I was throwing up with nerves," Harry says as he turns back to the stove.

"A little white lie to get us through," Liam says with a grin, which becomes a laugh when Harry glares at him and he hands him back the flung onion. "Hey, come on. Seriously, what's your plan?"

"Uh, I don't have a plan," Harry says with a shrug as he starts dishing up. He carries the plates over to where Liam is and sits down, reaching for the glass of wine Liam's poured them even though Liam doesn't really like wine, simply because he knows Harry does and Liam is the most well-mannered guest Harry will ever have to stay. "I thought I'd just go out, chat to some people and see if there's anyone I fancy."

"You make it sound so easy," Liam grumbles as he takes a bite. "Hey, this is good!"

"Well of course it is," Harry says, as close to exasperated as Liam's ever heard him. "What did you expect?"

Liam just winks at him and Harry flips him off before he picks up his fork and tucks in. "What do you mean, I make it sound so easy? It is easy."

"For you," Liam says and that's all he's willing to say. He ignores the look Harry gives him and is grateful that Harry changes the subject to the text he got from Nick a few minutes ago asking him and Liam to a party tomorrow night.

"He asked me as well?" Liam asks and he tries to keep the disbelief out of his voice.

"Yeah, course he did," Harry says as if he can't comprehend why Liam wouldn't be invited. "You'll come, yeah?"

"I guess, if you want me to," Liam says as he clears his plate and sits back, stretching. He sees Harry looking furtively at him and he grins. "You want me to lift my shirt, babe?"

"Liam Payne, you flirt," Harry mumbles through a mouthful of food. "You know I always appreciate your body, considering the amount of time you spend showing it off these days. You're staying tonight, right?"

"I might as well just unpack here, Haz," Liam laughs as he carries his plate to the sink and starts washing his plate. "I really need to go home at some point."

"Why?" Harry asks and the blunt tone has Liam looking over his shoulder at a frowning Harry. "I mean, you might as well just stay here."

Liam's initial reaction is to say no, of course he can't stay here when he's got a perfectly good flat two miles away when he realises that there's no actual reason for him to go home, except maybe to check that everything's in order and maybe pick up some different clothes. "Okay. But I pay for half the food and when you want me to go home, just kick me out, yeah?"

"No problem," Harry says easily and he smiles that slow smile of his that has Liam turning back to the dishes with a warm feeling in his chest.

"You wanna try that new boxset tonight?" Liam calls over his shoulder and hears Harry agree.

Once the dishes are clean and set to dry, Liam puts the show on and lies down on the sofa next to Harry, putting his head on Harry's lap and he sighs happily when Harry's fingers slide into his hair and strokes and rubs gently.

After a ridiculously good night's sleep, Liam is up and bounding around the house early, trying to get Harry out of bed despite his protests. He ends up physically lifting him out of bed and carrying a wriggling and yelling Harry to the shower, dumping him inside and turning on the water, chuckling as he leaves a very wet and bedraggled Harry grumbling behind him. When Harry emerges, he's got a beanie shoved over his head and he's glaring at Liam, who offers him a piece of toast and a banana as a peace-offering.

"Why am I up?" Harry grumbles as he swipes the banana and peels it carefully.

"We're going to go check on my place and I'm going to pick up some clothes and stuff," Liam explains as Harry swipes the toast and throws the banana peel in the bin.

Harry's expression immediately brightens. "Because you're staying here, right?"

"Right," Liam agrees and he's shoving Harry's jacket at him and throwing his keys, which Harry fumbles before holding them aloft victoriously with an adorable grin.

They pull up and manage to get inside without anyone noticing them and Liam hurries Harry into his apartment. As he looks around, everything seems okay and he disappears into his bedroom to start throwing stuff into a bag. Harry ends up lying on his bed, giving his opinion on what Liam should take until they've wasted two hours deciding on whether Liam should take his lightwash jeans or whether he needs five white t-shirts.

He checks his messages, finds that none of them are urgent and grabs his mail, shoving it into his bag as well and he figures he can open it at Harry's.

Liam runs into a Starbucks on their way home and grabs lunch, stopping to sign a few autographs and pose for pictures and he's grateful no one can see Harry through his tinted windows kerbside, because otherwise they'd have a mob on their hands. He manages to finally escape and falls into the car, groaning. Harry's look is sympathetic and he pats Liam's hand in compassion before pulling away.

It takes Harry most of the afternoon to get ready, while Liam spends the afternoon going for a run and vegging out in front of the telly. When Harry yells at him because he's not ready and they have to go in twenty minutes, Liam jumps in the shower, spends two minutes doing his hair, checks his stubble is still in some kind of tidiness, throws on his lightwash jeans and a white t-shirt, throws on a jacket for good measure and he's good to go.

Harry wolf whistles as Liam walks down the stairs. Liam blushes because he's still not used to compliments, even after all this time in this band of theirs where they aren't afraid to discuss at length each other's butts, their hair, their eyes, their hands, their torsos and well, anything really.

"You look hot, Liam Payne," Harry announces and leans in to smack a wet kiss on his cheek.

Liam's flush worsens and Harry's grin widens. Harry's in black skinny jeans and some kind of rainbow shirt which Liam thinks is both awful and amazing and he's got those damn brown boots on that Harry loves but Liam secretly wants to throw out with the trash.

"Maybe while we're finding me a cute boy, we'll find you a cute girl, huh Li?" Harry teases as he grabs Liam's hand and tugs him out of the door. Harry lets his hand slip into Liam's as they walk the short distance to Nick's place. "You're looking pretty irresistible tonight, you know."

"Shut up," Liam says fondly as he nudges Harry with his hip. Harry nudges him back and they're halfway to wrestling in the street before someone walks past them and Liam straightens, grinning stupidly as he holds Harry in a headlock. "You gonna behave tonight Haz?"

Harry twists slightly so he can grin up at Liam from his tenuous position. "Probably not," he admits honestly but he looks so adorable that Liam just rolls his eyes and lets him go. Harry instantly moves back into Liam's side and they turn the corner into Nick's place, Harry's hand on Liam's back and propelling him forward so that Liam has to walk in first.

After introducing Liam to what feels like a hundred people, Liam finds himself on a sofa, squeezed between two people he can't remember the names of but he's had too many drinks to care. He's talking to them about tattoos when he looks up and sees Harry talking to some guy. He's pretty cute, Liam thinks objectively. He watches Harry laugh at something the cute guy is saying and he feels a twist in his stomach.

Probably just had too much to drink.

He stands up carefully, excusing himself politely and heads for the bathroom. He gets stopped twice on the way by people wanting to talk to him, which he can still never get his head around because he's at a party with lots of famous guests, so why anyone would single him out is beyond him, but he manages to lock himself in the bathroom eventually and splashes some water on his face, grimacing as he peers at himself in the mirror. Running his hand through his hair, he tries to put himself together and after a few minutes, figures he's good to go. He heads back to where he last saw Harry, only to feel something launching themselves at his back. Without turning, he reaches down to pat the hands locked around his waist.

"Hey Haz," he murmurs before turning in Harry's arms. "How's it going?"

"I've met some cute boys, Liiiii," Harry says happily and cuddles closer, dropping his head onto Liam's chest and tightening his grip.

"That's great," and Liam really does mean it, even if he kind of finds it irritating that Harry can find it so easy to just collect people. "But you probably shouldn't be hanging off me if you want to find a date, you know."

"My dates have to love you Li or they're not worth it," Harry slurs carelessly as his hands drop to Liam's arse and while Liam's hardly surprised because the band grope each other all the time, he's reaching back to lift Harry's hands back up to his waist because it's not just the two of them here and if Harry's trying to find a nice boy to date, nice boys aren't going to go on dates with Harry if they see him all over another guy, no matter how innocent it is.

"How much have you had to drink?" Liam asks suspiciously as he reaches up to cup Harry's face and forces Harry to look at him.

Harry giggles. "You gonna kiss me Li?"

"Okay, time to go," Liam says firmly as he tugs Harry over to Nick and says goodbye and thanks him for inviting them. Harry plants a sloppy kiss on Nick's cheek and waves goodbye as Liam pushes him towards the door.

As soon as the fresh air hits him, Harry's whining and trying to curl into Liam, seeking warmth. With a sigh, Liam shifts so that he can wrap an arm around Harry's back and offers Harry his body warmth.

"You taking me to bed Li?" Harry giggles again as Liam turns into Harry's driveway.

"Something like that," Liam mutters as he fishes Harry's spare keys out of his jeans pocket and opens the door. He pushes Harry upstairs and pushes him gently onto the bed. He slips off Harry's boots and works on tugging his jeans off, cursing their bloody tightness and considers it a victory when they finally slide off. Harry's lost in his t-shirt as he tries to take it off and calls for Liam to rescue him. Wondering how this became his life, Liam tugs the shirt off him and wraps Harry in the covers.

"Hey, you come to bed too," Harry frowns as he reaches out to tug Liam down.

"Not yet, you idiot." Liam frees himself from Harry's long fingers and heads downstairs to get a glass of water for Harry, placing it on his bedside table. He then quickly strips and slips into bed but makes no move to cuddle Harry.

"Heeeeeeey," Harry whines as he tries to move into Liam's space and Liam fends him off. "What's wrong? Where's my cuddle?"

"No drunken cuddles," Liam says firmly. "You get handsy when you're drunk."

"You love it when I'm handsy," Harry says coquettishly before he giggles and reaches out again, only to find Liam's hands wrapped around his wrists, keeping him at bay. "Hey, this is kinky. You never mentioned your kinkiness before, Li."

Liam stays silent and prays for patience.

"I wanna cuddddddddle!"

Groaning, Liam turns around and wraps his arms around Harry, flexing his arms tightly so that Harry is imprisoned and can't move.

"We're going to discuss this kinky stuff you're into in the morning," Harry informs him with a yawn. "I think I like it. I definitely like your arms, Li. They're all bulging and strong and they make a boy feel safe, you know?"

Liam pushes down the weird bubble of feeling that appears in his tummy. "Go to sleep, Haz."

"Night Li. Love you."

"Yeah, you too, you stupid idiot."

Liam wakes up to find Harry's face inches away from his own. He blinks slowly as Harry's face comes into focus. Liam finds himself admiring Harry's face, because it's a very nice face, and he can see why girls go crazy over him. Sometimes he thinks he goes a bit crazy over Harry because otherwise he'd be in his own bed right now, in his own flat and seeing his own friends. Yet here he is, sharing Harry's bed and just staring at him like some kind of crazy stalker.

"Morning," Harry's husky voice has Liam lifting his eyes from where they'd rested on Harry lips to look up into curious green eyes. "Sleep well?"

"As well as I can with a handsy drunk," Liam replies but his voice is soft and his tone is fond, so Harry just lets his lips curve into a gorgeous smile and Liam finds his gaze drawn back down to look at it.

"Sorry Li, can't help it if you're irresistible when you're being all responsible and sensible and trying to get me into bed," Harry says and then bites his lip.

Liam frowns as he watches Harry's teeth worry his bottom lip.

"Seriously, thanks for looking after me," Harry says and Liam's gaze is still fixated on Harry's mouth so he watches as Harry moves closer and presses a soft kiss on Liam's lips. Harry moves back and jumps out of bed, complaining that he needs a shower and Liam is left lying in bed, staring after him.

When Harry emerges, he tries to persuade Liam to go sightseeing. Liam argues that they'll be mobbed as soon as they head outside together, because it's just about manageable when it's one of them, but Harry promises to dress inconspicuously and promises that he'll wear a baseball hat, an offer that Liam can't turn down which is why they end up queuing to get on the London Eye. Harry leans on Liam's back, looking over his shoulder and Liam stands as still as he can to keep Harry upright, because Harry has the worst balance in the world and Liam's braced to catch him if he starts sliding.

"Hey Li, do you know how anything about plumbing?"

"Uh, a little," Liam offers, a little dubious. "Why?"

"The kitchen sink's been a bit clogged, didn't know if you knew how to fix it or whether I should call someone," Harry murmurs.

"I can take a look later when we get home," Liam offers and he hears Harry saying something that sounds like thanks.

"Did you hear from any of those guys you met last night?" Liam asks idly as he watches the wheel turn, craning his neck slightly to look up to the top of the wheel.

"Yeah," Harry mumbles and Liam's pretty sure he's got his eyes closed and is two minutes away from falling asleep on him. "Two of them want to set up dates."

"I don't know how you do it," Liam grumbles, annoyed once again at the ease with which Harry can find dates. "What did you say?"

"Nothing yet," Harry says and he follows Liam as the line moves, keeping his head on Liam's broad shoulders. "What do you think I should do?"

"Um, go on dates with them?" Liam rolls his eyes and wonders how Harry gets through life, generally. "Go on a first date with both of them and see if you get on with them. If you do, pick whichever one you get on best with and go on another date. And if you enjoy that date, marry them."

Harry lets out a surprised laugh and presses a wet kiss on the back of Liam's neck, which has Liam shivering. "Straight to marriage, huh?"

"I think it's best that you don't have too many choices, Haz," Liam says seriously. "You're rubbish when faced with choice. You can't even pick a movie, let alone a life partner. I think it's best to just settle down as soon as you can find someone to put up with you and your idiot ways."

"In that case, we should get married," Harry muses.

Liam laughs. "Yeah, or you could marry Niall or Louis. Maybe not Zayn, I don't think he could live with you for more than three months at a time, max."

"Dating sounds like a lot of work," Harry says with a sigh and Liam turns around to look at him.

"But totally worth it," Liam tells him and Harry smiles sadly. Liam reaches out and hooks his hand around the back of Harry's neck, bringing him closer and resting his head against Harry's. "I promise. In six months when you're happily coupled off, I'll be more than pleased to tell you I told you so."

"Deal," Harry says and leans forward to press his lips against Liam's briefly.

"Come on lovebirds."

Liam and Harry jump at the muttered comment coming from somewhere further down the line as they realise the line has moved in front of them and they've been so wrapped up in each other that they haven't noticed. Flushing, Liam steps away from Harry and mutters an apology before catching up. Harry slips his hand into Liam's and grins up at him. "That was embarrassing, wasn't it babe?"

Harry spends the rest of their time queuing cooing at Liam and pretending to be boyfriends, amusing himself while Liam just pretends to ignore him. He carries on, all through the ride, snuggling up to Liam, pressing kisses against his neck and cheek and any bare skin he can get to before Liam shrugs him off, sneaking his arms around Liam and calling him all the pet names he can come up with, his favourite being Li-beans, for reasons that completely escape Liam.

"You really need to get laid," Liam says as they walk away from the wheel, making Harry laugh loudly.

"Hey, I'm trying," Harry points out.

"Not with me!" Liam says exasperatedly.

Harry gives him a funny look. "I meant with my dates, Li."

"Oh, right," Liam says and pretends that he's not completely embarrassed . "Did you text them back?"

"Yeah, I'm going on a date tonight. That okay?" Harry asks hesitantly.

"Course it is," Liam says, punching Harry lightly in the arm and pushing away the sad thought that he'll have to spend the night alone for the first time in forever. Perhaps he'll call Andy and see if he's around for a catch up.

"I won't be late or anything, especially if he's an idiot," Harry says as he presses against Liam and looks across at him through his eyelashes.

"You can be as late as you like, Haz," Liam says reasonably. "Don't worry about me, seriously. I'll text Andy and see if he's around."

"Okay," Harry says and Liam can tell from his tone that he's unsure. Liam doesn't want him to talk himself out of going on the date so he shoots off a quick text to Andy, who replies immediately to say that he can meet him for beers.

"See? I'm all sorted," Liam says and is entirely grateful to have such a good best friend.

"But you'll come back home after, right?" Harry asks and he slips his hand into Liam's unobtrusively.

Liam squeezes it. "Yeah, course I will. All my stuff's at yours."

Harry just smiles and they head towards the Tower of London.

Liam has a great evening catching up with Andy. He only texts Harry three times to make sure he's okay, that the date is going okay and to see what time he'll be home. From what he can gather, Harry's date is very nice, he was punctual and Harry will be home by 10pm. Liam's a bit dubious about how well the date can be going if he's going to be home that early, so he insists on leaving at 9.50pm, despite Andy's incredulous protests and heads home.

The house is still empty so Liam puts the kettle on, because Louis has drilled it into the rest of them that tea is good for any situation and sits down, playing on his phone and trying to pretend that he's not nervous.

Nervous in case it went well or nervous in case it went badly?

Liam pushes the rogue thought away and starts to drum his fingers against the table.

When the door finally opens, Liam jumps up and hurries to meet him. Harry looks normal, Liam thinks, no tears but no foolish grins either.

"So?" Liam thinks the wait is going to kill him, even though it's only been five seconds before Harry walked in.

With a shrug, Harry hangs up his jacket. "It was okay."

"Just okay?" Liam asks, grabbing Harry's arm and dragging him into the kitchen and sitting him down while he pours the tea.

"Yeah, just okay," Harry says. "Don't think there'll be a second date."

Liam ignores the weird leap his stomach makes and sits down, placing the tea in front of them. "Oh, well better luck next time, yeah?"

"Yeah," Harry says, taking a sip. "I'm having lunch with the other one tomorrow."

Liam ignores the instinct to protest, because it's another few hours he'll have to spend alone, and seriously what was wrong with him? He's managed to fill his free time from tour and band duties very well in the past, so why is he even thinking about moaning when Harry dares to spend some time going on dates, something that Liam has long thought overdue?

"Cool," is what Liam manages to say. He sees Harry looking a little down and he reaches out to tug a curl. "How can anyone go on a date with you and it just be okay?"

Harry bites his lip and flushes, keeping his eyes down. "Dunno."

"If that were me, I'd be dragging off to the nearest bed," Liam says with a teasing wink that Harry catches with a reluctant grin.

"Well, you do drag me to bed every night," Harry says with a straight face.

Liam pulls a face, which entices Harry to reach out and bop his nose.

"That'll have to stop when you start shagging one of your dates," Liam says and tries to stay upbeat when really the thought makes him much sadder than it should.

"Yeah, I guess," Harry says and Liam thinks he sounds sad too. "But not tonight."

"Nah, not tonight," Liam says as he stands and puts the cups in the sink to wash up tomorrow. He turns around and shoves Harry towards the stairs, both of them giggling stupidly. "Tonight, I'll put up with your wandering hands and flailing limbs."

"You love it," Harry returns as they run up the stairs together, Harry chasing Liam with absolutely no hope of catching him. "As much as I love your stupid snoring and deadweight arms draped around me."

"Don't really know why we don't just make up the guest bed," Liam mutters although really that's the last thing he wants.

"Because I hate the guest bed and refuse to sleep in it," Harry points out as he strips and climbs into bed, picking up the remote and turning on the telly and finding something silly to watch.

"No, for me, stupid," Liam says as he climbs in the other side and grabs the remote and changes the channel to the football.

"Like I said, I refuse to sleep in it," Harry repeats and lays his head on Liam's shoulder to watch the game.

Liam refuses to acknowledge how that thought makes him ridiculous, stupidly happy.

"I fixed the sink," he says quietly.

"You're the best," Harry says just as quietly and he reaches out to squeeze Liam's arm in gratitude, and Liam doesn't mind when Harry leaves his hand there while they watch Match of the Day.

When Harry disappears on his lunch date, after Liam's sat through three outfit changes and Harry trying to change his mind whether to actually go which resulted in Liam stealing Harry's house keys and pushing him out the front door, Liam decides to go for a run. He's been slacking on his workouts since they've been home and he's suddenly got excess energy to burn. He runs through the streets of London, keeping his stolen-from-Harry-beanie-covered head down and just focuses on the beat in his earphones and the rhythmic thud of his trainers hitting the street. He runs until his lungs are burning and he runs until he can barely breathe. He runs until sweat is dripping down his face and down his back and his whole body aches.

He runs until he stops thinking about how Harry's date is going and whether he'll be home yet.

When he finally heads home, he finds Harry sitting on his own doorstep, tapping his feet and texting. Harry looks up and his eyebrows raise slowly.

"Shit, I forgot I had your keys," Liam swears, rummaging in his shorts for a key. "Sorry Haz."

"No problem," Harry shrugs and Liam's glad he's the easygoing one because Liam would have been pitching a fit by now. A quick glance at his watch tells him that he's been gone almost three hours. "You look sweaty."

"I am sweaty," Liam mutters as he finally finds his keys and lets them in. "I need a shower."

He disappears upstairs and spends far longer than he needs to in the shower. When he emerges, he finds Harry curled up on the sofa, still texting.

"So how did it go?" Liam asks as he flops down on the chair opposite.

Harry looks up and frowns at him. "Yeah, it went okay."

"So why are you frowning? Okay is good, right?" Liam asks as he closes his eyes and stretches his aching limbs.

"No reason," Harry murmurs but it has Liam opening one eye to squint at him. "Well, what are you doing over there?"

"What am I- uh, stretching?" Liam answers, bemused.

"Well, stretch over here," Harry grumbles. "Stop being unsociable."

Liam shakes his head in disbelief but gets up and joins Harry, who yanks him down to lie across him, head in Harry's lap. "That's better."

"You know it's not unsociable to sit on different pieces of furniture, right?" Liam murmurs but he's not really complaining when Harry's stroking his hair and it feels so nice.

"Course it is when there's only two of you," Harry says like Liam's being stupid. "Especially when it's us."

Liam doesn't answer because he's half-asleep, the combination of a crazy workout and Harry's soothing touch lulling him to drowsiness.

"I don't think he's the one either," Harry says quietly and Liam struggles to open his eyes, looking up at Harry to see him smiling sadly down at him.

Liam reaches up and strokes Harry's cheek, smiling as Harry leans into his hand and closes his eyes.

"That's okay, Haz," Liam reassures him. "You'll find someone, I promise."

"Yeah," Harry whispers and they stay there for ages, Liam's hand on Harry's face and Harry's hands in Liam's hair.

Every time Harry goes on a date, Liam goes for a run. After a week, Liam's fitter than he's ever been and yet he continues to push himself every time. He needs to run to clear his head each time because he knows Harry is going to come back from his date quietly upset and disheartened and it's going to break Liam's heart a little more. They've developed a routine of sorts where Liam puts on Harry's favourite movie or television show to cheer him up and Liam wraps Harry up as tightly as he can in his arms and they stay there until they're drowsy enough to fall into bed, exhausted.

Liam kind of loves it. And he thinks Harry does too because he traces the muscles on Liam's arms and wraps his hands around Liam's wrists and that's how they settle in together.

When Louis calls to say he's coming down for a visit and bringing Zayn, Liam spends the morning before they arrive bouncing around, cleaning and fussing until Harry pins him to the sofa. Of course, Liam could escape if he wanted to but he enjoys Harry wriggling around on top of him and he likes seeing Harry grinning stupidly above him, so he stays where he is while Harry holds his wrists together.

And that's how Louis and Zayn walk in on them. Of course Louis has keys, because he treats Harry's place like his own when he's in town, so Harry and Liam barely spare them a glance as Harry crows above Liam.

"Interrupting something are we, lads?" Louis asks, amused.

"Liam was being his usual puppy self and running around chasing his tail in excitement, so I had to sit on him," Harry explains.

"Well, let him loose and come give us a cuddle," Louis says fondly and Harry scrambles off Liam, giving him a pat on the cheek before he climbs off and finds himself wrapped up in Louis. When they pull apart, Liam is tangled up with Zayn on the sofa and Louis tugs Harry so that they both end up on top of them and Liam is glad he's strong enough to hold all three of them because otherwise he'd be pretty squashed right now.

"What have you two been up to?" Louis asks when they finally let each other go and he's made tea for everyone.

"Loads of stuff," Liam says, looking over at Harry with a smile.

"Yeah," Harry agrees. "We've been sightseeing, we've seen Grimmy and that lot, we've been to a couple of parties and we've watched loads of movies, right Li?"

"Lots of movies," Liam says with a fond eye roll. "Harry's stocked up on weird-looking clothes so that he can be papped in designer shit."

"Heeeey," Harry protests and dives on top of Liam, who just catches him and holds his hands together, laughing as Harry struggles to get free. Neither of them notice the look Zayn and Louis share.

"Wait, have you two spent all your time together since we got back?" Zayn asks, a bemused look on his face.

"Yeah," Harry says, finally wrestling his hands free and pushing his hand against Liam's chest to push him back. "Liam kind of never went home."

"Harry convinced me to stay because he doesn't like to be alone," Liam shrugs as if it's not unusual.

"So you've been living here?" Louis clarifies slowly, glancing at Zayn again.

"Pretty much," Liam says.

"Liam's a pretty good housemate," Harry leans forward and whispers to Louis and Zayn, as if Liam can't hear him. Liam ducks his head slightly to hide his beaming smile. "He fixes stuff."

"Oh really?" Louis says and his tone invites Harry to reveal more.

"Yeah," Harry nods seriously. "And he washes up after I've cooked and he doesn't mind doing the washing."

At Louis' stare, Liam just shrugs and tries to pretend that he's not flushing.

"Sounds very ... domestic," Louis says slowly.

Liam ignores the pointed look Louis is giving him and turns the conversation round to what the other two boys have been up to.

All day, Liam is acutely aware of Louis' stares. He's aware of it when Harry curls into Liam and he's about to wrap his arms around Harry like usual but stops himself. He's aware when Harry announces that Louis and Zayn don't have to share because Liam's been sleeping with Harry this whole time and Louis' eyebrows can't possibly rise any further. He's aware when Liam and Harry move around the kitchen and each other fluidly when Harry makes dinner because they do this every night and they have a routine. He's aware when Harry shouts to Liam that they've been invited to another of Grimmy's parties, with the emphasis on _they_.

It's just that he and Harry have spent a lot of time together over this break, that's all. They've developed a rapport, not dissimilar to Harry and Louis' in the past.

When Harry reveals over dinner that he's been on some dates, Louis immediately turns to Liam and stares.

While Zayn talks to Harry about his dates, Louis leans closer to Liam and says quietly, "So how do you feel about your boyfriend going on dates with other boys?"

Liam just stares at him, his eyebrows drawn together. "What are you talking about Lou?"

"The fact that you and Harry have some weird love nest setup going on here. What the hell is going on, Li? You're living here, sharing Harry's bed, snuggling together on the couch, going on dates, playing house together. Surely you can see that this is a bit ... unusual."

"It's not like that," Liam insists because it's really _not_. And he turns back to the conversation, deliberately ending the conversation, but he knows it's not over.

When they sprawl out in front of the television with their beers, Liam doesn't think it's weird if Harry nuzzles into Liam's neck or if Liam's arm curls around Harry, because Liam would do this with any of his bandmates.

When they eventually stumble up to bed, hugging each other goodnight and Liam and Harry crawl into bed together, Liam doesn't think it's weird because he's shared beds with all of the band at one time or another.

When he eases behind Harry and wraps one arm around his waist, he doesn't think it's weird because it's Harry and it just can't be weird.

Liam's final thought before he drops off to sleep is that it can't be weird because it feels so right.

When they wave Louis and Zayn off in the morning, Liam tries to put aside the warning Louis gave him when they hugged goodbye.

"Just be careful, yeah?" he'd whispered in Liam's ear. "I hope you know what you're doing, both of you."

Liam just squeezed his shoulders because even though he's wrong, Liam appreciates that Louis cares so much.

When Harry presses a kiss against Liam's cheek before turning to go back inside, Liam's stomach totally doesn't swoop and he doesn't want to lift his hand to press against his cheek whatsoever.

But Liam is slowly noticing things that he didn't notice before. Like how much he and Harry touch. Liam doesn't realise he's doing in half the time and he's pretty sure Harry isn't aware either, but they rarely go five minutes without reaching out to the other. Or how much Liam hates talking about Harry's dates. He'd thought he just didn't like seeing Harry upset when they didn't work out, but since Louis' visit, he's trying to be more honest with himself and that means admitting that a part of him doesn't want Harry's dates to go well because it means Liam will have to go home and this closeness they've achieved, something closer than the bond they'd built in the past three years, would be lost. And Liam feels particularly awful about this particular knowledge because he does want Harry to be happy and to be in a relationship that makes him smile and laugh and be endearing. But he can't finish that thought process out because he's pretty sure he's not ready to face that particular truth yet.

Every time he touches Harry now, it's different. He finds his hands lingering, unwilling to pull away from Harry and lose the connection. He makes sure he gets up first in the morning, not waiting for Harry to wake up before he jumps in the shower because when he wakes up to find Harry pressed against him, it's had a visible physical effect on him that he needs to address before Harry can see or feel anything.

And it's while he's in the shower, hand on his cock and almost at orgasm that Liam admits to himself that he fancies Harry. His hand pushes against the shower screen as he comes loudly, unable to hold it in anymore and he folds to the floor as his shaky legs give out, letting the water run over him.

It takes ten minutes for Liam to force his brain to reengage. Another minute to climb to his feet. Another minute to get his heart rate back to normal.

He's not sure what to do. Logically, he knows he has to get out of the shower, get dressed and pretend for the next fifty years that he hasn't just had an epiphany that could break everything in his life. His friends, his career, his Harry.

He at least manages the first step. He's dressed and out of the house within minutes, running harder than he's run all week. This time he doesn't just want to forget Harry's dates. This time, he wants to stop thinking about kissing Harry. Stop thinking about setting up house with Harry and yelling honey I'm home in a semi-ironic way every evening. He really doesn't want to think about the pitying look Harry's going to give him if he ever learns about Liam's crush because Harry will be so nice about it all while breaking Liam's heart.

He keeps running until he almost passes out. Then he grabs a chocolate bar and heads home slowly, wondering what the hell he's going to do.

"Liiiiiiaaaam!" Harry's throwing open the front door and staring at him in horror. "What have you done to yourself?"

"Running," is all Liam manages to say because he's suddenly more breathless than he was before he almost passed out. Harry is standing in front of him and all Liam can think about is pressing his lips to Harry's and going back to bed. But that's not going to happen, obviously.

"Get in," Harry says and grabs Liam's shirt, yanking him forward. Liam stumbles and almost falls on Harry but manages to save himself at the last second. "Jesus, Liam."

"Sorry Haz," Liam says slowly as he tries to regain his balance.

"You have to go shower, quickly," Harry says with a wrinkle of his very adorable nose. Liam wants to punch himself in the face.

"Yeah, I'm going," he says tiredly and trudges upstairs, belatedly realising that Harry's following him.

"We've got a guest coming for lunch," Harry says quickly and it's enough to make Liam's heart sink as if he knows what's coming.

"Oh?" he manages to say as he starts to strip off but he's so exhausted that Harry steps forward to help him and it's the worst possible thing to happen because Liam has to force himself not to wrap his arms around Harry or breathe in his scent.

"Yeah, it's kind of maybe ... he might be boyfriend material?" Harry says and the hope in Harry's eyes just about kills Liam. He can feel his barely-there smile slipping and just about keeps it in place.

"Wow, that's great Haz," Liam says stiltedly. "I'll just jump in the shower then."

"Okay," Harry says brightly and leaves Liam to step into the shower and bang his fist against the wall in pure frustration. On the very day he realises that he wants to play happy families with Harry forever, Harry Styles, perennial bachelor, is bringing his first boyfriend home for Liam to meet. His life sucks. It really, really sucks.

He climbs out of the shower wearily and throws on jeans and a t-shirt before heading downstairs. He freezes halfway down when he hears Harry's giggle and another voice. Oh God. He can't do this. He's feeling awful anyway because it's not every day you realise that you're in love with one of your best friends and there's no way he should be expected to smile and be nice to Harry's new boyfriend when really all he wants to do is growl and throw him out of the house before throwing himself at Harry and begging him to give Liam a chance.

But Liam knows that Harry is relying on him and he can't let Harry down, no matter what. And there's a chance that this guy could be the love of Harry's life, as hard as it is for Liam to even think about that possibility, so Liam needs to suck it up, get through the next few hours and then head home to wallow in his stupidity for the next two weeks until they're back on tour.

Liam straightens up, plasters his best fake smile across his face - something he's grateful for all the media training for - and heads into the room, looking for all the world as if he can't wait to meet Harry's boyfriend.

Two hours later, Liam's head is pounding and he wants to be sick. Harry's saying goodbye to his boyfriend while Liam's sitting in the living room with his head in his hands. He wants to hate Ben, he really does, but he seemed nice and he kept glancing at Harry and smiling and Liam just wants to rip his head off because Liam is apparently the jealous type and Ben is fucking gorgeous and funny and he makes Liam feel absolutely inferior. He watched Harry laughing and giggling and generally being adorable and Liam thinks he might just keel over in heartbreak. He pulls himself together though, because really who dies of heartbreak on the same day they fall in love? He heads upstairs and starts throwing stuff into his bags and he's stupidly sad that it only takes five minutes to clear up all his stuff and erase himself from Harry's home. He trudges downstairs and walks into the kitchen, dropping his bags on the floor.

Harry spins round and his face falls. He takes in the bags and Liam's expression and he starts to shake his head. "No."

"It's time for me to go home, Haz," Liam says as brightly as he can manage while his heart weeps a little. "You're going to want to have this place to yourself now that you have Ben and you're too nice to throw me out, so I'm throwing myself out."

"Liam," Harry moves over to him and reaches out to grab his hand but Liam steps back, mostly for self-preservation. He ignores the surprised look in Harry's eyes and just shuffles around. "Liam, please don't go, I don't want you to go."

"Come on Harry," Liam says as gently as he can manage, trying to overlook the fact that his voice has inexplicably deepened. "This isn't a permanent arrangement. I have to go home. How would you explain to your boyfriend that you share a bed with another boy every night?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Harry says with a frown.

Liam just shakes his head. "He wants to be your boyfriend. And you want him to be your boyfriend otherwise you wouldn't have introduced us. I think he's really nice, Harry." The words don't quite choke him. "You're good together."

" _We're_ good together," Harry mutters and Liam's heart breaks a little more.

"We're mates, Haz," Liam says, mostly for his own benefit. "I know you're scared of relationships, and that's normal because it's a big step. You have to learn to trust someone and give your entire self to them and it's scary because you don't know for certain that it'll work out, but you have to try and you have to be open. And you cannot share your bed with anyone other than your boyfriend, no matter how good mates you are. Okay?"

"Liam ..." Harry's voice sounds like it's coming from far away.

"I'll text you later, yeah?" Liam leans forward and presses a fleeting kiss on Harry's forehead, moving back before Harry can grab hold of him. "Thanks for letting me stay here, Haz. It was fun."

Liam grabs his bags and hurries out. He doesn't look back.

When he gets home, he crawls into bed and shuts his eyes, trying not to think about how lonely his bed is without Harry in it or how his sheets don't feel the same way Harry's do and they don't smell like Harry's do. Pushing it all aside because he's afraid he's going to go crazy, he wills himself to fall asleep and to start putting everything Harry-related into a big, black box labelled 'friends and nothing more'.

Three days later, Liam thinks he's finally descended into crazy. He hasn't showered or gotten dressed since he's been home. He's watched stupid rom-coms that make him shed a tear and he hates them so much but he's also slightly addicted to them. He hasn't left his apartment and he's sick of takeaway but not so sick of it that he wants to go outside into the world because he's not ready to face anything yet. All he can think about is Harry and how much he misses him, and until that goes away, he can't face anything else. He spends his hours thinking about what Harry's doing, who he's seeing, whether he's asked Ben to be his boyfriend yet, whether Ben's stayed over yet, whether Harry's making out with him or if they're fooling around in bed and that's why Liam thinks he's actually crazy now.

His phone has rung several times but he doesn't want to answer it so he doesn't. It's probably just his mum or his sisters, and he really can't deal with them now. Sometimes there's a knock at the door but he doesn't answer that either.

It takes another two days before Liam finally tires of takeout and gets in the shower. He emerges feeling a bit better but when he walks into the store, all he can think about is food shopping with Harry and how much fun it was. Liam grabs a basketful of necessities and runs home, locking himself in once more.

The next day, he's woken by someone knocking on the door. He screws up his face and blearily looks at his watch - it's 11am. He switches off the television which is stuck on the menu page of the Love Actually DVD he'd been watching and stumbles towards the door.

He couldn't be more surprised to see Louis standing there, staring at him.

"Liam, Jesus, what the hell?" Louis shoves him back and steps into the apartment and slams the door shut behind him.

"Hey Lou," Liam's voice is croaky from lack of use. "What brings you here?"

"The fact that you disappeared off the face of the planet and Harry won't talk to me or the other lads and you look fucking awful, man."

Liam just shrugs because he can hardly deny it.

"Come here," Louis grabs his shoulders and pulls him close, wrapping his arms around Liam, who just collapses into him. "Hey, what's this?"

"I fucked up," Liam mumbles into his shoulder.

"Yeah, I know," Louis sighs and rubs his back soothingly. "Come on, I'll make tea and we can talk about what a fucking idiot you've been."

Liam laughs a little brokenly and sits on the sofa, staring at nothing until Louis places a cup of tea in his hands and sits next to him.

"So tell me," he invites.

"I might have, um, accidentally ..." Liam stutters because he's not said the words out loud before and they scare him. "Well, you know."

"Fallen in love with Harry," Louis supplies helpfully.

Liam's shoulders slump.

"Well, he is charming and beautiful and adorable, all that shit," Louis teases gently but Liam's just withdrawn into himself. "Have you told him?"

He shakes his head. "I just realised it when Harry invited his new boyfriend round."

"Oh fuck," Louis' sympathetic tone almost kills Liam.

"Yeah," Liam half-laughs but it sounds painful even to him. "Great timing, right? Not that anything would ever happen with me and Harry but still."

"Why wouldn't something happen between you two?" Louis asks before slurping his tea to amuse Liam. "You're fit, he's fit. You've got loads in common, you know each other's bad habits and you still fancy him, oh, and you've been playing boyfriends quite happily for the past few weeks at dear Harold's."

"We weren't playing boyfriends," Liam denies. "At least, not intentionally."

"It was clear as mud, mate, to me and Zayn," Louis tells him, softening his words with a kind smile. "And it wasn't just you."

"That's just Harry though, right? I mean you two used to be like an old married couple," Liam says sadly because he wishes it wasn't true, that it was different between him and Harry but no matter how much he wished it, it didn't make it true.

"Yeah, but that was just us being silly and scared and clinging to each other," Louis says. "You two were proper domestic. It was pretty cute, actually."

Liam just attempts a smile but when it falters, Louis' arms encircle him and he pulls Liam into his body and they just stay locked together.

"I hate it when you're like this," Louis mutters.

Liam sniffs and apologises immediately, which just has Louis tutting crossly. "No, you wanker. It's perfectly alright to be upset, I'm just saying I hate it because you're so bloody resilient most of the time so when you're like this, it makes my stomach hurt."

Liam's response is to reach out and pat Louis' tummy gently and it has Louis laughing but he doesn't let go.

"I'm going to sit here with you all night and let you wallow," Louis says softly. "Then tomorrow, you're going to shower, clean this place up because it looks like a pigsty, then we're going to get you back on track, right?"

Liam just nods.

The next day, Louis makes Liam turn on his phone. He's got a few worried texts from Zayn and one from Niall, announcing that he's the Mullingar pie-eating champion and he expects due adulation when they next see each other. He's got a few texts from his mum and Ruth, Andy sent him a funny picture and there are six texts from Louis, all more irate than the last. Liam looks at him sheepishly but Louis ignores him.

He's got a lot of texts from Harry.

**Liam, are you home?**   
**Liiiiiaaaaam, where are you?**   
**Liam, call meeeee!**   
**Why are you ignoring me? :-(**   
**Liam?**   
**I miss you and your stupid arms :-(**   
**I can't sleep. Text me!**

And that was just the first night.

**What are you doing? Let's go do something fun!**   
**Are you still alive?**   
**I'm going to call Lou if you don't respond.**   
**Lou's coming down in two days if you don't respond.**   
**DID YOU HEAR ME? LOU'S ON HIS WAY**   
**Liam, seriously, are you okay?**   
**You're not answering your door, so you must be out but call me, okay?**   
**Oi Payne, send me a text to let me know you're alive.**   
**Liiiiiiaaaaaaaam. I miss you. I MISS YOU.**

 

Liam feels a little guilty. Hell, he feels a lot guilty.

"Miss you, did he?" Louis asks smugly.

"Only because he's lonely in that house," Liam reasons but his heart is pounding a little. "I'm sure Ben is making it easier on him."

"Funny thing," Louis muses. "When he called me in a panic because you'd disappeared off the face of the planet, he didn't mention Ben, not once. And when he called me yesterday and ordered me to come down to find you because he'd been round three times with no answer and he couldn't find you at your gym or with Andy or your parents or sisters or with the rest of us and there were no pap shots of you and he'd even gone on tumblr to see if anyone had caught sight of you, he still didn't mention Ben. I didn't even know Ben existed until you mentioned him last night."

"Perhaps I should text him, let him know I'm okay," Liam says slowly.

"Yes, I think that's a brilliant idea," Louis says with a straight face.

**Sorryyyyy, been really busy. Lous hear nowwww.**

He gets a response straightaway.

**Don't move one inch, I'm coming over!**

Liam groans.

"That's my work done, I'm off," Louis says and grabs his stuff, pats Liam's cheek comfortingly and heads out of the door while Liam's still stunned on the sofa. "I'll be at Zayn's, call me after!"

It takes Harry exactly seven minutes to make it to Liam's door, and Liam's not quite sure how that's possible because he lives further away than that but the minute he opens the door, he's got a handful of Harry and he's falling back onto the floor with the momentum with which Harry hits him.

"Don't you ever scare me like that again, Liam," Harry growls into his neck.

"Uh, I'm sorry?" Liam offers but really he's just lost in the pleasure of having his arms around Harry and knowing that Harry was worried about him.

"You're such an idiot," Harry mutters. "You didn't have to give me so much space that you disappeared altogether."

"Oh, uh, no, okay," Liam stutters. "Perhaps we can get up?"

"I'm quite comfortable here," Harry mumbles and his arms tighten.

Liam's tighten as well and they're locked in a tangle of limbs.

"So, how's it going with Ben then?" Liam asks the question he's been dreading for the past week.

"Yeah, it's okay," Harry shrugs, burrowing his head deeper into Liam's neck. "He's nice. He's okay at kissing."

"That's nice," Liam manages and he's quite proud of himself despite the sick feeling in his stomach.

"I missed you," Harry lifts his head at last and his stare is hard and bright.

"We've spent longer apart than this," Liam points out but his heart is racing.

"But it's different," Harry whines. "We've spent two weeks together, just the two of us, and the two months before that on tour. I miss you. Come back to mine."

"Harry, I'm not coming back to yours," Liam says with a gentle roll of his eyes. "Come on. We talked about this."

"Ben can just sod off then," Harry grumbles.

Liam's body jerks in reaction but he sternly reminds himself that Harry's just kidding.

"I hope someone's warned him about your mood swings," Liam teases as he gives into temptation and reaches up to tuck a curl behind Harry's ear.

"No, not yet," Harry grins. "He still thinks I'm adorable."

"More fool him," Liam teases again.

"Hey, I _am_ adorable!" Harry protests.

"Not nearly as adorable as you think you are," Liam replies and tweaks Harry's nose. "Or as adorable as our fans think you are."

"Tell me I'm adorable," Harry orders as he grabs Liam's wrists and holds them above his head and too late Liam remembers that they're lying on the floor in his apartment, with Harry lying on top of him, bodies pressed together and Harry restraining his hands.

"You know I can flip you without even trying, right?" Liam points out.

Harry grins happily. "I know. But you won't. You know why? Because I'm adorable."

"I'm still not moving in," Liam says firmly.

"Fine," Harry huffs as he finally clambers to his feet and holds out a hand to help Liam up. He slides his hand into Liam's as he reaches back to slam the front door shut and tugs Liam over to the sofa and quickly arranges them into Harry's favourite position. "But you'll come over and have dinner, right? And watch movies? And fix my broken stuff?"

"Harry," Liam says warningly and he has to steel himself against Harry's pleading eyes. "I just can't, okay?"

"I don't understand." Harry's frowning and Liam can see that Harry really and truly doesn't get it. It's both endearing and frustrating in equal measure, which pretty much sums up their entire relationship up to the moment Liam moved into Harry's, when it progressed to intimacy and awareness.

"I know you don't," Liam says tenderly as he reaches out to run his hand through Harry's hair and lets himself enjoy the feeling once more before he starts his Harry detox. "You should invite Ben round for dinner and curl up in front of the telly with him."

"Fine," Harry sighs as he reaches for his phone with his free hand and shoots off a quick text. He gets a reply within minutes and throws it down on Liam's coffee table. "There, he's coming round tonight."

"You could sound a little happier about it, Haz," Liam says with a gentle nudge. He knows that this is just Harry being Harry and when Ben arrives tonight, Harry will have a much better evening than they've ever had together at Harry's home, but he still has to bank down a little frisson of happiness at Harry's sulking.

"I'll be happier when you cuddle me and tell me you missed me as much as I missed you," Harry says grumpily.

Liam grins stupidly. "I missed you, you whiny, needy crybaby."

Harry turns and glares at him.

"Okay, okay," Liam laughs and lifts his hands in protest. "I missed you. Lots."

"That's better," Harry beams and presses a kiss against Liam's cheek. If Liam flushes, it's okay because Harry's turned back and is fidgeting to get Liam's arms around him the way he likes. Liam grabs the remote and puts on some antiques show that he knows Harry likes and they waste most of the day lying together on the sofa, not really talking.

Liam has to practically throw Harry out when it gets late and Harry needs to be home for his date.

"Fine, I'm going," Harry pouts as he stands in the doorway and looks at Liam. "But I'd rather be here. Don't forget Grimmy's party tomorrow."

"Wait," Liam reaches out to grab Harry before he turns and leaves. "What party?"

"Grimmy's party tomorrow," Harry says slowly. "Did I not tell you?"

"No, in the six hours you've been sat next to me all day, you didn't once mention a party," Liam says with a sigh. "What time?"

"Get to mine for eight, yeah? We'll go together," Harry says and he's off with a little wave. "Louis, Zayn and Niall are coming too. Miss yooooou!"

"Go away!" Liam calls after him but ruins the sentiment with the utter fondness he can hear in his own voice.

When he closes the door, he forces himself to sit down and find something distracting to watch so that he doesn't have to think about what Harry's doing, because if he does, he might just break.

Liam decides to get up and go out in the morning, so he goes for a run and after a quick shower, heads into the city to do some shopping. He signs some autographs and poses for pictures and manages to almost double his wardrobe in one trip.

He gets a text from Louis mid-afternoon asking how it went with Harry.

**Went ok. He went home 4 a date wth ben. il b ok, promise. cu 2niteeeeee!**

Liam dresses in black jeans and one of his new t-shirts. It clings to his shoulders and hangs loose around his torso. He doesn't wear a belt and chooses boots to complete the outfit. He styles his hair back and runs a hand over his stubble, figuring that he can't be bothered to shave and he quite likes the look anyway. He grabs a jacket on his way out and heads to Harry's, wondering whether Ben's going to be there or not.

When he reaches Harry's door, he reaches for his key automatically before he remembers that he doesn't live here anymore. He rings the doorbell and waits, his foot tapping nervously on the step as he waits.

Zayn answers the door, an odd look on his face that Liam barely has a second to decipher before Zayn's pulling him inside.

"Hey man," he says quietly before he steps in for a hug that Liam returns instinctively.

"Hey," Liam echoes with a smile as they pull back to look at each other. "Alright?"

"Yeah, yeah," Zayn says. "Come in, Niall's in the kitchen and Louis and Harry are upstairs dealing with some crisis."

"Oh, uh, everything alright?" Liam glances up the stairs as they pass, resisting the urge to run up and check that Harry's okay.

"Yeah, it'll work itself out," Zayn says and Liam's not sure what he means but figures it's probably about clothes or hair.

"Liam!" Niall catches him in a bear hug and Liam leans in, holding him close before letting move back a little but he keeps hold of him.

"How's home?" Liam asks, grinning happily.

"Ah, amazing," Niall says and pulls Liam down to sit with him as he regales him with all the gossip from Mullingar.

Zayn disappears for a smoke halfway through, and Liam suspects he's already heard this at least once, and when he comes back in, he heads upstairs. Liam watches him go and has to force his attention back to Niall rather than whatever is going on upstairs.

When he checks his watch, it's almost 9pm and he wonders what's holding them up. When he mentions it to Niall, he just waves his hand carelessly and says something about them being down when they're ready.

When Louis comes into the kitchen, Liam's surprised to see he's fairly subdued.

"Alright, Leemo?"

"Uh, yeah," Liam answers with a frown. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Louis answers distractedly and pats Liam on the shoulder.

"Where's Harry?" Liam asks and he meets Louis' gaze.

"He's just getting ready," Louis says. "He'll be down in a minute. You know what he's like, he likes an entrance."

"So is Ben coming then?" Liam asks idly, or as idly as he can manage.

"No, no he's not," Louis responds and his hand returns to Liam's shoulder to rub gently.

Liam leans into him and that's how they stay until Harry emerges five minutes later.

"Hey Liam," Harry greets him.

Liam knows something's wrong. He can see it in Harry's eyes and the way his smile is a little forced. He knows it because Harry hasn't run in to throw his arms around Liam, the way he has for the past four weeks. And he knows because Harry is standing in the kitchen doorway while Liam is several paces away. In the past four weeks, whenever they've been in the same room, they've been within touching distance of each other at all times. They've gravitated towards each other, and he actually hates how far away Harry feels right now.

God, no wonder Louis picked up on Liam's feelings so quickly. It would have been obvious to a complete stranger, let alone one of their closest mates.

"So, ready to go?" Louis asks brightly as he slips his arm around Liam's waist and squeezes gently.

Niall grabs Harry and spins him around, ushering him out of the house, followed by a more sedate Zayn. As Louis pushes a reluctant Liam towards the door, Liam can't take his eyes away from Harry.

"Lou, what's going on?" Liam asks in a hushed voice.

"Just Harry being a diva," Louis says with a cheeky grin. "Nothing to worry about."

"Let's get trashed!" Niall shouts as they turn into Grimmy's road.

"Not a bad idea," Louis admits to Liam as they walk into the house and Liam loses them all immediately.

It's okay though because Niall's back within seconds, handing Liam a drink. Shrugging, Liam tosses it back in one and grins at Niall, who whoops excitedly. Liam stops at the fourth drink and switches to water. He hasn't seen Harry or Louis all night, but he's caught up with Nick, he's seen Niall bouncing around and checking in and he's currently chatting to Zayn outside while Zayn smokes.

"You okay then," Zayn asks as he blows out smoke slowly.

Liam gives him a look and Zayn just returns it steadily.

"I'll be okay," is all he'll say.

"What are you going to do about Haz?"

Liam sighs heavily. "Slowly torture myself while Harry falls in love with some perfect bloke who is probably great in bed and makes stupid jokes that make Harry fall about with that stupid laugh he does."

"Sounds like a hell of a plan, Liam," Zayn says sardonically.

"It's the best I can do, Zayn," Liam says heavily and he leans into Zayn when he slings his arm around Liam and takes another drag.

Liam starts to round them all up when the party starts to fade. He has Zayn look after Niall and makes sure they stay near the front door. He searches high and low for Louis and Harry but they aren't anywhere to be found. He knocks on every door in Nick's place but no one has seen them. He knocks on the last door, Nick's en suite bathroom and Louis' face appears. He's blocking Liam's view and steps outside, forcing Liam back.

"Alright Liam?" he asks cheerily.

"Yeah, we're just heading off," Liam says distractedly as he tries to look past Louis but he's being effectively blocked. "You coming?"

"Yeah, we'll be right down," Louis says. He turns to go back in the bathroom when he spins around and throws his arms around a surprised Liam. "I love you, you know?"

"Uh, love you too Lou," Liam says, patting his back and wondering exactly how much Louis' had to drink. "See you downstairs, yeah?"

Louis just nods and disappears, leaving Liam staring at a closed door.

Liam heads back downstairs and finds Zayn and Niall where he left them. They chat quietly but Liam's gaze is on the stairs, waiting for the boys to appear.

When they do, Liam's up immediately and moving forward before he can stop himself. He moves past Louis and stops in front of Harry. Liam waits for Harry to look up, worried and when he does, Liam's heart stops because Harry looks wrecked. He steps forward and pulls Harry close, wrapping his arms around him, locking them tightly the way he knows Harry likes. He feels Harry freeze for a second before he softens and wraps his arms around Liam and they stay there for who knows how long before Louis is coughing and suggesting that they head home.

Liam lets his arms drop but he slots his hand into Harry's and squeezes tightly. Harry doesn't squeeze back but Liam feels him move closer and they walk slowly home, following the others at a distance. Liam's desperate to find out what's wrong, but he can wait a bit longer until he can get Harry alone.

When they turn into Harry's drive, Louis already has the door open but the three of them are standing outside, waiting for them.

"Uh, we're going to head back to Niall's place," Zayn says quietly. "Leave you two to sort things out."

"Look after him, Li," Louis says before Liam can ask Zayn what he's talking about.

"Yeah, course," Liam says as if Louis' said something stupid.

Then they're gone and Liam is left standing outside of Harry's house, holding hands with a clearly upset Harry.

Liam steps into the house and pulls Harry with him, shutting the door behind him.

"Sofa or bed?" Liam asks, turning to look at Harry, who seems to be avoiding his gaze.

"Bed," Harry says quietly.

Liam's seriously worried now, but he leads Harry upstairs and they strip down to their boxers quickly before lying down together on the bed.

"What's wrong Harry?" Liam asks and he laces his fingers with Harry's.

He sees Harry look down at their hands.

"Uh, Louis says I should just be honest," Harry says and Liam hates the vulnerability he can hear in Harry's voice. "I um, well, you know I saw Ben last night."

Liam nods and his throat tightens.

"Well, it was going okay but all I could think about was that he wasn't the right person," Harry says slowly. "He wasn't the right person at all."

"Oh, Haz," Liam whispers and moves closer to rest his head against Harry's. "It's okay. You'll find someone, I promise."

"No, it's not ..." Harry pauses and moves back so that he can look at Liam. "Louis promised me it would be okay to tell you and I know it is because you're the sweetest, nicest, most loyal person I've ever met."

Liam tries not to get distracted by Harry's words and tries to focus on what Harry wants to tell him. "You can tell me anything, Harry, you know you can."

"Yeah," Harry says with a sigh. He lifts himself up onto his elbows so that he's looking down at Liam. He reaches out a hand and strokes Liam's face, smiling fondly when Liam's eyelids flutter slightly. "Yeah, I think I can."

Liam waits patiently because he knows it can take Harry a while to build up to what he wants to say. So when Harry starts lowering his head, he just waits with an encouraging smile. Harry keeps coming though and when he presses his lips against Liam's, he's so surprised that he just freezes.

He cannot move. He can't move when Harry moves back and looks at Liam in increasing horror. He can't move when Harry makes a little noise that has Liam blinking quickly. He can't move when Harry closes his eyes and swears under his breath.

When Harry moves to climb off the bed, Liam unfreezes and grabs Harry's arm in a vice-like grip, preventing him from moving.

"Fuck, I knew Louis was wrong, I knew it," Harry was muttering as he pulled against Liam's grip.

"Wrong about what, Harry?" Liam asks, his voice husky.

"About this," Harry gestures between them, eyes a little wild, his hands shaking. "He said it would be okay. I thought it would be okay."

"Harry," Liam pulls him close and Harry falls back onto the bed, finding Liam leaning over him and looking down at him. "You just kissed me."

Harry shrugs, avoiding Liam's gaze, neatly pinned in by Liam.

Heart racing, Liam slowly leans down, echoing Harry's move and presses his lips against Harry's.

When Harry's arms come up to encircle Liam's shoulders and pull him closer, Liam groans against Harry's mouth and Harry starts licking into his mouth eagerly. Liam buries his hands in Harry's hair, letting his fingers get tangled in the curls. He feels Harry writhing beneath him and _fuck_ it's a turn on. One of his hands slips down Harry's body to grasp Harry's hip and his fingers dig in as Harry bites Liam's bottom lip. Liam groans again and he breaks the kiss. When Harry lets out a disapproving whine, which has a serious effect on Liam's mental acuity, Liam presses another kiss against Harry's lips before letting his mouth drift across Harry's jaw and down his neck, pressing soft kisses anywhere he can find bare skin. He finally lifts his head and looks down to see Harry gazing at him with sleepy eyes. He notes the smile playing on Harry's lips and he dips again to kiss him.

"Louis' never wrong," Liam murmurs with a smile and he grins happily when Harry lets out a quick giggle.

"We should talk, yeah?" Harry asks and when he licks his lips and glances back down at Liam's mouth, Liam highly doubts he can even finish a thought let alone have a serious conversation. There's too much to say and they're both tired and emotional. They've taken a massive step forward and while Liam can barely think past the fact that he's making out with Harry in Harry's bed, he knows they'll make more sense in the morning.

"Let's talk tomorrow when we're sober and I can think properly and string two sentences together," Liam suggests and he sees Harry nodding in agreement.

"Yeah, tomorrow," Harry says and his voice has already turned sleepy. "But you'll stay, right? Here? With me?"

Liam settles himself against the pillows and reaches out to pull Harry into his side, where he places his head on Liam's shoulder and snuggles in, pressing kisses against Liam's chest and giggling. "I'm not planning on going anywhere."

"Goodnight, Liam," Harry whispers and lets his fingers trail across Liam's chest, making him shiver and seriously doubting the wisdom in trying to get some sleep when Harry's all pliant and affectionate and Liam could just turn round and press Harry ...

Liam sighs and forces himself to cool off. Plenty of time for that later, he thinks to himself. He tightens his arms around Harry, presses a long kiss against Harry's head, which makes Harry wiggle a bit and sigh happily, before they both relax almost in sync and he closes his eyes.

They're both asleep almost immediately.

When Liam opens his eyes, his hand is already outstretched, reaching for Harry. When he finds nothing but sheets, he sits up quickly and looks around but Harry isn't there. He pauses, listening to hear whether Harry is in the bathroom or downstairs, but the house is silent.

He throws on his jeans and heads downstairs, hoping that Harry's lying on the sofa watching cartoons, or in the kitchen making tea, but he's not.

Liam races back upstairs to grab his phone, but there are no missed calls. No texts. He looks around but there are no notes. There's nothing.

Liam tries not to think the worst. He tries not to think about Harry freaking out when he woke up this morning. He tries really, _really_ hard not to think about Harry having regrets about the night before. About Liam. He tries really hard to think about everything he _knows_ about Harry, about how sensitive he is and how he tries to put everyone else before himself. He tries to think about how deeply Harry loves every single one of them, and how he's never deliberately hurt anyone in his life. He tries not to think about how Harry might be breaking his heart.

It's so much to not think about that Liam climbs into bed, shuts his eyes and tries not to think about anything at all because all he can do is lie here, in Harry's bed, and wait for him to come home.

After three hours of staring at the ceiling, Liam decides that he can't wait any longer because Harry clearly isn't coming home and he dresses as fast as he can and runs all the way home, ignoring the stares of passersby, who hopefully just think he's doing the run of shame and don't pay any attention to the fact that he's one fifth of One Direction and doing the run of shame.

He jumps in the shower and just stays under the spray, turning up the temperature until it's painful and harsh on his skin. When he drags himself out, he's red raw and the pain is now as external as it is internal. But he's trying not to think about that because he knows there's a reason. He knows Harry wouldn't do this to him, not deliberately, because he didn't just imagine Harry kissing him last night. All he had to do was be patient. Harry would call him and explain everything and they'd talk everything out and they'd be okay. They had to be okay.

Liam doesn't know what he's going to do if they aren't okay.

He dresses and lays down on the sofa, staring up at the ceiling, his phone resting on his chest so that he can check it every few minutes.

When his phone finally vibrates, he grabs it and looks at the text message. It's Harry.

**Hey, meet me at Covent Garden in 30 minutes? Wear something smart. I'll explain everything. Can't wait to see you .xx**

Liam's up and stripping off before he even processes Harry's text. He changes into a nicer pair of jeans, wears a button down shirt with the first two buttons undone and grimaces as he slips his feet into a pair of lace ups. He's so desperate to just _see_ Harry that he doesn't care that Harry basically abandoned him for a whole day because he knows if he just sees Harry, it'll sort itself out.

He arrives right on time, seeing Harry standing by the station trying to look inconspicuous. Liam moves towards him and he sees the exact second Harry spots him. His dimples flash and Harry's moving towards him. They stop inches away from each other and Liam's grinning stupidly because Harry is beaming. Harry grabs Liam's hand and tugs him down a side street and into what seems like a dark house but Liam realises it's a restaurant that is deserted.

Harry guides him towards a table near the back and waits for Liam to sit, bemused, before Harry sits as well.

"Hey," Liam says because he's suddenly nervous and he needs to fill the silence.

"Hey," Harry echoes, before he's grinning again and leaning forward. "You look great, Li."

Liam flushes. He can't help it. He's not used to Harry giving him compliments, they're more likely to yell insults at each other's choice in clothing. He finally notices that Harry's in a dark shirt and jeans. "You look great too, Haz."

Liam watches as Harry blushes and looks away, and he thinks it might just be the most adorable thing he's ever seen in his life.

"So you're probably wondering where I've been today," Harry says eventually after they've been staring and grinning at each other for a few minutes. Or possibly hours.

Liam nods slowly.

"I've been planning this," Harry says, gesturing to the restaurant. "It's all ours, tonight."

Liam's eyes widen. "Wow."

Harry giggles. "There's more, Liam," he says with an eye roll. "I haven't spent all day hiring a restaurant."

"Oh good," Liam says with a relieved sigh and crosses his eyes, making Harry laugh.

Harry reaches out his hand and lays them on the table, palms up. He looks at Liam and he looks calm, Liam thinks. He reaches out and places his hands in Harry's and Harry closes his hands, letting his thumbs run back and forth over Liam's hands.

"So we should talk, yeah?" Harry asks for the second time and Liam nods. "So you've probably guessed that my date with Ben went spectacularly badly."

Liam frowns, because he hasn't really thought about Ben at all, to be honest.

"I just kept thinking that it wasn't right because he wasn't holding my hand like you do, and he wasn't laughing at my stupid jokes like you do, and when we were on the sofa, watching some terrible film that Ben thought was hilarious, his arms were round me and I just couldn't bear it. They weren't your arms and he didn't feel like you and then I kind of freaked out and Ben left and basically I don't think we'll be seeing each other again," Harry says and Liam thinks he's leaving out a lot of information.

"So I called Louis who came over and after I explained that I didn't think it would work with Ben, Louis asked why," Harry continues and he looks up to smile sweetly, which has Liam squeezing his hands. "Well, Louis said that perhaps I was looking in the wrong place for a boyfriend. I told him I didn't know where to look then, but he just gave me a weird look and asked what I wanted in a boyfriend. So I listed all the things I wanted, and he asked if perhaps there was already someone who did all those things, who was all those things."

"Yeah?" Liam prompted.

"Yeah," Harry says simply. "Turns out that person was already right in front of me. Fixing my problems, staying in my bed, taking me on dates and looking after me. The only thing was, it was completely platonic. And Louis made me realise that I didn't want it to be platonic. So I freaked out again because I screamed at Louis that you were straight, you had girlfriends and you fancied girls and when I finally stopped shouting, Louis told me that I was an idiot and anyone could see that you and I were, like, practically a couple."

"Yeah, Louis had to tell me that we were basically boyfriends before I realised it as well," Liam says with a smile. "So we're both idiots."

That makes Harry grin stupidly. "So basically I spent most of yesterday freaking out and then when I saw you in the kitchen, I just wanted to go over to you and have you put your arms around me like you usually do, except I also wanted to kiss you stupid. So when we made it to the party, I dragged Louis upstairs and he spent most of the night telling me to just go for it and I just worked myself up until I freaked out again."

Liam waits but Harry seems to have said all he wants to say. "Did you freak out this morning?"

Harry shakes his head solemnly.

"Are you planning to freak out at any point tonight?" Liam asks and he lets a little smile slip past his lips.

Harry shakes his head, grinning.

"So you're all done freaking out?"

"Totally calm," Harry confirms.

Just then, a waiter appears and Harry orders two beers. Liam scans the menu and they order. Liam waits for their beers to arrive and the waiter to disappear before he looks back at Harry.

"So you're okay then, with this?"

Harry shakes his head. "Liam, it's crazy how okay I am with this."

Liam can't stop the smile that stretches his cheeks so much that they start to ache. Harry laughs and he's grinning too and they're just two idiots, grinning at each other.

"So what are we doing after dinner?" Liam asks finally. "Or are we staying here?"

"I have a few plans," Harry says mysteriously and Liam lights up.

"Oh, I love surprises!" Liam bounces up and down and Harry just looks at him fondly.

They enjoy dinner, laughing and flirting and touching each other as much as possible. When they can't touch hands, Harry's foot is rubbing against Liam's calf and Liam's leg is stretched out to rest against Harry's leg, tangling together. Harry offers Liam a bite of his chicken and laughs when it falls off Harry's fork before Liam can lean forward. Liam cuts a piece of his steak and puts it on Harry's plate, arguing that it's safer than trying it Harry's way, while Harry argues that it's not romantic and Liam says that chicken that's fallen on the table isn't romantic at all.

They skip dessert and Harry pays the bill, ignoring Liam's protests. When they stand, Harry reaches for Liam's hand and curls his own around Liam's. They smile stupidly at each other before Harry leads him out of the restaurant. They walk through the streets, Liam letting Harry guide the way, just happy to be holding Harry's hand and sharing stupid, secret smiles with each other.

Harry stops outside a theatre. Liam looks up, confused, because it looks closed.

"Uh, so this is kind of all ours for the night as well," Harry says shyly and Liam laughs at Harry's utterly endearing version of date night.

"What are we watching?" Liam asks as Harry pushes the door open and he smiles charmingly at the girl behind the counter.

"It's a surprise," Harry says and winks at the girl, who blushes. "Do you want popcorn?"

Liam just raises an eyebrow and Harry grins as he reaches out to grab some chocolate. "And butter popcorn and a large coke."

Liam nods in approval and tries to pay once again but Harry just glares at him as he hands over the cash.

They walk into the theatre and Harry picks seats in the back row, although Liam protests that they've got the screen to themselves so they could just as easily sit nearer because no one is around anyway. When Harry pouts, Liam gives in and follows him to the back row.

The film starts as if by magic and Liam chuckles when he hears the familiar theme. "You chose Toy Story?"

Harry grins. "I know you've seen it a million times, but this is our first date and I wanted it to be perfect."

"It is perfect," Liam says earnestly and he can't resist the urge to lean forward, cupping Harry's face in his hands and placing a kiss on Harry's lips.

Except then they both forget about the movie and the food and spend most of the movie making out and copping feels that Liam feels slightly guilty about because really they're still kind of in public but then Harry's hand is in his lap again and Liam forgets what he was thinking about anyway.

By the time Buzz and Woody glide into the car, Liam's shirt is undone and Harry is in his lap, his own shirt completely off and his hair beautifully mussed, thanks to Liam's wandering hands.

"This is the best first date ever," Harry says as he presses a kiss against Liam's birthmark and then licks it, grinning when Liam shivers.

"Absolutely," Liam agrees as he pulls Harry closer and licks into his mouth.

"We should probably talk about how this is going to affect the band and stuff," Harry murmurs against Liam's mouth.

"Yeah, probably," Liam's distracted by Harry's hand moving lower and hovering over Liam's lap. "Maybe we should go home."

Harry beams and presses a quick kiss against Liam's mouth. "Yeah, let's go home."

"Unless you had something else planned?" Liam asks as he kisses Harry and tries to button his shirt up, although he's pretty sure he's misaligned the buttons. Not caring though, he reaches for Harry's shirt and tries to get it on Harry, who isn't interested in putting clothes on at all.

"Just a karaoke bar," Harry murmurs as he finally shrugs his shirt back on.

Liam groans. "Next time, yeah?"

"Yeah," Harry agrees as he stands up and hauls Liam to his feet.

"Seriously Harry," Liam pauses and Harry stops, his hand in Liam's. "This was the best date. Thank you."

"I just wanted to do something special, you know?" Harry says and Liam steps closer and kisses him gently. "I know we weren't dating when you were staying at mine, but you were kind of the perfect boyfriend anyway and I wanted to show you that I can be pretty good at this stuff too."

"Haz, you don't have to show me anything," Liam says softly and Harry wraps his arms around Liam's waist. "You just have to be you and I just have to be me and together we'll work it out, yeah?"

"Okay," Harry says happily and leans his head against Liam's chest. "But when we get home, I can show you how fit I think you are, right?"

"Definitely," Liam agrees. "It's actually kind of compulsory."

"And if you wanted to lift me in your stupidly strong arms, that'd be okay," Harry murmurs and Liam grins.

"Okay, Haz, that's good to know."

"And while I don't normally put out on the first date, I think you might be in luck tonight," Harry says and he's tugging Liam towards the door. "Because really, we've been dating for over a month now."

Liam's still laughing as Harry hails a cab and they fall inside, limbs entangled.

"Okay, but when we celebrate our anniversary, I'm counting it from today," Liam warns him.

"Anniversary," Harry repeats quietly and his eyes go soft.

Liam just rolls his eyes, checks the cabbie isn't looking and yanks Harry towards him, kissing him senseless.


End file.
